The Power of Belonging

When you think about it, all of us, every human person, are looking for “home.” We’re longing for a place and a people to call our own. We want to feel connected and accepted. Rejection is a common human experience but it also one of the most painful. The reason is simple: God created us for relationship, for community.

Our longing to belong is blocked by a couple of powerful barriers: (1) We have this pesky issue called “sin” that has resulted in alienation and a disconnection between us and God, each other, and the rest of God’s good creation; and (2) We live in a culture known primarily for “individualism.” I’ll never forget the survey that showed “rugged individualism” as the #1 element of American culture; that same survey revealed that the #1 complaint by Americans is loneliness. Go figure! In 2000 Robert Putnam published a sociological study of American culture entitled, “Bowling Alone.” In it he showed that “the stock of social capital” in our society had seriously plummeted, resulting in growing disconnections from our families, friends, neighbors and communities. Unfortunately, this trend in American society can also be seen in the American church.

The theme of “belonging” is a powerful one in the New Testament. Jesus brought Good News of the universal availability of God’s salvation to all people. Jesus even protected the right of little children to belong in the Kingdom of God. “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these” (Matthew 19:14). He encouraged his followers that “you belong to the Messiah” (Mark 9:41). While being shipwrecked Paul testified about his own belonging: “Last night an angel of the God to whom I belong and whom I serve stood beside me” (Acts 27:23). Paul identified the Roman believers those who “are called to belong to Jesus Christ” (Romans 1:6). He also told them that they belong to each other. “For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others” (Romans 12:4-5). That statement seems so un-American! “I don’t belong to anyone! I’m not the slave of anyone!” But IN CHRIST, “each member belongs to all the others.” We belong to each other. We love the Lord and we need the Lord, but we also love each other and we need each other. As members of the Body of Christ, each of us equally belongs to each other, no matter what our particular gift or calling (see 1 Corinthians 12:15-16). There are no classes in the Body of Christ; no one has any kind of special privilege or entitlement. We are one! We belong to each other!

In Christ, we not only have an individual identity, we have a corporate identity. The question is not only, “Who am I” but also, “Whose am I?” Paul tried to find the balance when he stated, “Though I am free and belong to no one, I have made myself a slave to everyone” (1 Corinthians 9:19). It is only in Christ that we belong to each other. Paul referred to those “who belong to the family of believers” (Galatians 6:10). We are family!

The local church is the primary context in which we experience the family of Jesus. The word “fellowship” refers to the “common life” of members of Christ’s Body. By the Spirit we have a vital connection to each other, a connection that results in life, health and growth. Paul described it this way: “From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work” (Ephesians 4:16). Membership in the church was so important to the early believers, the very worst that could happen to someone was to be “excommunicated,” or literally dis-fellowshipped or de-membered, to be removed from the life of fellowship with other members of the Body. After all, they belonged to each other. Unfortunately, the modern American church no longer shares this value. “Church discipline” is no longer a value in the church, simply because so many members excommunicate themselves, disconnect themselves from their brothers and sisters at the slightest whim. It’s almost as though the culture of no-fault divorce in our society has found an expression in the local church.

It's possible these days to read a large number of articles and blogs that complain about common leadership and membership issues in the church. In almost every case I see the root issue as being a deficient view of the church, a picture of the church that reflects something other than the Kingdom community established by Jesus and launched in the New Testament. I've had the privilege of pioneering a local church and functioning in a variety of pastoral leadership roles from Missouri to Oregon to Georgia, and I've been reflecting (a sign of old age) on the difference between a church plant and a church split. A church plant occurs in the context of a specific mission, a specific calling to a place and a people at a certain time. As a mission-specific, apostolic venture each church plant seeks to extend the influence of God's Kingdom into an area that is largely untouched and underserved. On the other hand, a church split is simply a breakaway group of Christians (usually led by a breakaway leader who has a "better idea") who establish a separate congregation as a result of drawing members out of other churches. I also see a couple of disturbing trends in the American church: (1) Some communities have a mobile, portable "congregation" of "members" who move from church to church, seeking out the newest and most exciting experience of "church," and (2) It has become not only acceptable but popular for new congregations to form in a way that actually reflects a "church split," drawing members out of other churches and thus dividing and weakening the local church in that community. It's possible to "belong" in a way that reflects alienation and separation, not community. 

One of the greatest callings and responsibilities each member of the church has is the ministry of “acceptance” and the offer to finally “belong.” This was a high value for the apostle Paul. “Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters” (Romans 14:1). The church is not called to judge or reject outsiders. “Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God” (Romans 15:7). We are a community committed to each other, in good times and in bad. We are also a welcoming, inclusive community with the clear message, “Everyone is welcome!” A culture of unconditional love will empower those who experience it to come back into the arms of the Father, to be healed, liberated and restored. Where else can someone experience acceptance if not in the local church. That is the power of belonging!