At the risk of sounding sentimental (if not pious), I have to admit that I love Jesus. I don't just love the idea of Jesus or the idea that Jesus died for my sins. I don't just love his life and teaching. I love the person, Jesus of Nazareth, the Christ, the Son of the Living God. Being a Scandinavian male from the upper Midwest I prefer to avoid all PDEs (Public Displays of Emotion), and I usually succeed quite well. Except when it comes to Jesus. I have a very clear memory of being an 8-year-old boy at the altar of a church on a Sunday evening, looking on a classic picture of Jesus praying in the Garden of Gethsemane - and weeping openly. In fact, I can't watch a movie or even a play about the life of Jesus without losing all composure at some point. I try hard to hide it, but that only gives me a headache. I am and shall always be a Jesus Freak!
It's fairly common for me to have some kind of "picture" of Jesus in my mind when I am praying. When I am afraid, I picture Jesus asleep in the boat and myself sitting next to him - if he's not afraid, then neither should I be afraid. If I'm facing a particularly challenging season, I picture Jesus walking on the water in the midst of the storm and inviting me to join him. (I think you get the picture.) So as you can imagine I have spent the last six months seeing Jesus calmly riding the wind and the waves while I stand in the boat wondering what it's all about. I've had a lot of time to reflect on that story. Here are some of my thoughts:
The context of this experience of Jesus was a boat that was "a considerable distance from the land" being "buffeted by the waves" and opposed by the wind (Matthew 14:24). No one likes to have their circumstance buffeted and opposed, but sometimes it just happens. Occasionally it seems as though chaos has broken out and upset the delicate balance of our orderly lives. And it usually happens when we have traveled a significant distance from shore, when there are no good opportunities to return to a safe harbor. These times feel like abandonment - by God and those closest too us. What we don't know at first is that the storm has been whipped up by God, that God is in the midst of the storm. Only later do we appreciate that we were able to move into a whole new level of relationship with Jesus as a result of the storm.
The circumstance of the wind and waves does not in any way intimate the Lord (Matthew 14:27). Because Jesus is the Lord of all creation, he has authority over both wind and waves. He has overcome, and is able to simply walk on the waves and through the wind. When Jesus first appeared to the disciples in the storm his first words were, "Take courage!" Don't panic or shrink back as though your life has fallen apart (if not come to an end). "It is I." Jesus is in the storm, ready and willing to reveal himself in a unique way, a way that could not be experienced on the shore or a calm sea. "Don't be afraid." The opposite of faith is fear, but fear is instinctive, an automatic response to any perceived threat of danger. The encouragement to not be afraid is simply an exhortation to trust God anyway, no matter how dangerous or uncertain the circumstance might seem.
The best faith response in the midst of the storm is to ask for a fresh revelation of Jesus (Matthew 14:28). Peter could have asked any number of good questions: Why are you walking on water? Why didn't you take better care of us, allowing us to experience this storm? Why did you leave us and then send us into this storm? Why aren't you calming the wind and the waves? Instead Peter's response was, "Lord," acknowledging the authority of Jesus in this situation. "If it's you," wanting to be sure he was seeing Jesus and not having some kind of psychotic break. "Tell me to come to you," relying on the Lord's authoritative initiative in his life, asking for a personal, relational response from Jesus that would lead to a new, fuller experience of Jesus. "Tell me to come to you on the water," expressing a willingness to overcome the perceived threat in order to see and know Jesus more fully. For Peter it was not about the wind and the waves and it was not about walking on water - it was about Jesus!
At the right time, Jesus invites us to take our eyes off of our circumstances and put our eyes on him alone (Matthew 14:29). Jesus responded to Peter with a one word command - "Come." He was not inviting Peter to walk on water; Jesus was inviting Peter to come to him, to know him better, to grow in his ability to trust him in every situation. It didn't require some great mystic experience; it just needed one simple word from the Master. "Come!"
The word of the Lord calls for a simple response of obedience (Matthew 14:29). I'm sure Peter could have paused to consider the appearance of Jesus, the word of his invitation, the situation of the boat in the storm. Peter could have weighed the pros and cons of getting out of the boat. After all, God loved him too much to expose him unnecessarily to danger. Maybe he should take a time out and reflect on his options; maybe Jesus just wants him to be willing to come. Instead, Peter simply "got down out of the boat." He had to actually climb over the side of the boat and lower himself onto the water. The time for prayerful reflection was over - it was time to act. Peter "walked on the water." His simple trust and obedience empowered him to do what he never could have done on his own, even with all of his talent and ability. And Peter "came toward Jesus." Peter's focus was on Jesus - not on some destiny or reward, the fulfillment of some vision or kingdom purpose. Jesus wasn't a means to an end - Jesus was the end!
A faith walk with Jesus has moments of distraction and doubt (Matthew 14:30). Even though Peter was having a wonderful time of hearing the voice of the Lord, responding in obedience and experiencing the grace and power of the Lord, the wind was still blowing and the waves were still crashing down on him. Who could condemn Peter for being distracted by all of that and taking his eyes off of Jesus? It would have been much better if the storm has simply stopped the moment Peter's foot hit the water. Instead, the storm continued and Peter's storm-tossed experience of Jesus continued. Fortunately, Peter did not take his eyes off of the essence and the meaning of his experience. When in his moment of distraction and doubt he began to sink, he quickly asked, "Lord, save me!" He knew that the Lord was still with him and that he could count on the Lord to rescue him, no matter how weak his faith.
Jesus is always faithful to take us by the hand and give us whatever assistance we may need as we seek to know him and obey him in the storm (Matthew 14:31). "Immediately," without a moment's hesitation, "Jesus reached out his hand and caught him." Sinking and perishing was not an option. Jesus had not set a trap for Peter. Jesus was not testing Peter's survival instinct. Jesus was revealing himself to Peter. Jesus was giving Peter an opportunity to know him better and trust him more. There was no way Jesus was going to let Peter sink. In a very personal way Jesus grabbed Peter's hand and "caught him." Being caught by Jesus was no doubt a part of Peter's scary but beautiful experience in the storm.
The storm is a faith-building means to an end and is not intended to be a lifestyle (Matthew 14:32). Peter had an encounter with Jesus that would significantly form his relationship for all time. But the moment came when both Jesus and Peter climbed back into the boat (where the other disciples had been observing the whole drama), and "the wind died down." There would be other storm experiences for Peter, given him by God to equip him to walk more intimately with Jesus and be more fruitful during the times when there were no storms, but now it was time for this storm to calm down.
During these last few months I've spent considerable time reflecting on this story. I started by reading my favorite John Ortberg book, "If You Want to Walk On Water, You Have to Get Out of the Boat." I've even had the opportunity to teach a video-based class based on the book - twice! All the while I've seen myself out there with Jesus, trying to ignore the wind and the waves, practicing my spiritual water-walking skills. Only recently have I come to realize that this entire time I have been standing in the boat, looking at the storm and looking at Jesus, reflecting on how wonderful it would be to know him and trust him enough to actually get out of the boat. I've gotten close to the edge of the boat without actually enduring the danger of climbing out. I've even wondered whether or not it would be better to go back to the familiar shore. Only recently I've come to see that I have not walked on any water yet - I've only been screwing up enough courage to haul myself over the side of the boat and begin the adventure with Jesus. Water walking is still ahead. At least I've learned enough to know that it's not about the storm and it's not about walking on water - it's about Jesus! "I want to know Christ" (Philippians 3:10).
